The good thing is that the pain hasn't been quite as intense as it has been the last few days. The bad thing is that the pain hasn't been quite as intense as it has been the last few days.
Why is that, you ask?
Well, when the pain spikes to an unbelievable level and you get even the slightest bit of relief, it's so overwhelming that you want to get down on your knees and accept a level of pain that on any other day would be extremely depressing. When it spikes that high and you thank God that you have gotten any relief at all and then you realize what will be with you always it is a very sobering experience.
This is why I love the people that have become friends through blogging. They keep me real and grounded. They keep me in the loop and not so isolated. They also keep me in their prayers and I keep them in mine. They understand what I'm feeling and what I'm not feeling. I can pick up the phone because I know they will be there.
I have to say that in this life of mine I have never put a lot of stock in "girl friends." I've had a close circle of girlfriends that is very small. One of my best friends I met in the 7th grade. There wasn't a lot of women in that circle. For the longest time I found it was a headache to have too many girlfriends. If I didn't call all the time I got grief. Then there was the gossip and all sorts of chit-chat garbage. I found it tiresome. It was easier not to let a lot of people in "the group."
Then something changed.
As I get older I find that women are wonderful. Gone are the politics and envy and what's left are women who are just trying to find their way in this goofy world. We find that we can genuinely enjoy our diverse experiences and opinions. We can agree to disagree. We can be there in joy, triumph, sorrow and accomplishment. The old saying is true. Men can come and go but a girlfriend is forever.
Now with the decreasing energy levels and pain involved with Fibromyalgia a new group of women have entered my circle of friends. These women truly understand but it's more than that. We've reached out in a way that I don't think we would have ever done before. It's a need for acceptance in a world that doesn't accept chronic illness. It's need for understanding in a world that doesn't understand chronic pain. It's the need to vent when no one else can stand to hear one more word about how we feel. It's the need to feel a touch when we can't stand for anyone else to touch us. It's a touch; albeit an invisible one, but it still warms the heart.
I have found so many joys in blogging. Not only have I been able to open myself up and write about experiences that are either depressing or embarrassing but I've also been able to open up and ask for help. That, for me, is huge. I enjoy looking for new comments. Feedback is wonderful. I wish that everyone who reads my words would say what they think; whether that be a positive or negative opinion. I think all of us have a need for some sort of recognition and this arena is no different. I see all sorts of places and people that read this and I wish they'd let me know how, or if, this blog touches them.
So this is a little thank you to the people that follow me. Lynn-Marie, Michelle and CJ are wonderful women and I thank them so much for everything that they've given. The are truly angels and I want them to know that I appreciate them so much.
So tonight there's been a little relief from the pain. I will still be chugging pain medication this evening but at least it's not unbearable. I'll still need my heating pad so that I will get some warmth in these bones but thanks to some wonderful people in my life my heart is already warm.
No comments:
Post a Comment