ROSE AND THE TERRIBLE, HORRIBLE, NO GOOD, VERY BAD DAY

It started out bad.

It didn't get better as the day went on.

The prognosis isn't good for the rest of the evening.
Thanks, however, to Judith Viorst for a magnificent description of my day.

Let me give you a little overview of the day. I don't know why I'm constantly surprised when I put my feet on the floor in the morning and it feels like razor blades are embedded in them. I'm used to the stiffness that doesn't go away until mid-morning; I can deal with that. As I hobble to the kitchen to make a concoction that kind of resembles coffee, I remember that I left my thyroid medication by the bed. I try to take it first thing in the morning because if I don't, I'll forget. So I hobble back to get the medication. Unfortunately, my dog has gotten up and he wants to be outdoors. So as I walk on what feels like pins and needles, I put Mr. H outside and then start my trek back to the kitchen.

Crap.

I forgot the fricking medication AGAIN.

Screw it. I'll take it later.

I'll live to regret those words.

So I start my coffee ( and I use the term loosely) and get the non-fat creamer and Sweet and Low so that it will resemble light brown milk. My daughter visibly shudders when she watches me make coffee! As I get the cream out of the refrigerator it slips out of my hands and suddenly, splat! Yep, I've got cream all over the floor. I am so irritated because to mop this floor literally puts me down for days. The dog comes in looking like he hit the lottery and at this point I let him lick the mess up off the floor. He doesn't digest milk well, so I know I'll pay for this later. I throw practically a whole roll of paper towels on the floor and wiped the cream up. At this point, I don't want the coffee anymore. I head to the fridge and get a diet coke.

I figure I'll go to the gym. I don't know why I do it. Everything I read says I need the movement and that it will help with the pain. So far it hasn't helped at all. I'm wiped out after I walk and I come home and go to sleep.  Now let me explain the trip to the gym.

I get in the car and pull out of the garage. Then I look down and I pull back into the garage. I go inside and get my phone and the gym bag. I can't remember anything today! Okay, I'm ready to go now. No, I'm not. I have to take my pain pills otherwise I won't be able to walk. If I don't take it before I get there it won't kick in. Great. So I stop the car and take the pain medication.


NOW I'm ready to go.


By the time I get to the gym I'm exhausted. I just want to go home and put the covers over my head. Maybe I just should have stayed in bed today. It isn't looking good so far but, I keep going and make to to the gym and walk. 


I hate looking a women older than I am who are practically running. I am so envious of people that can walk without pain. As I walk I realize how much I took for granted. I took my health for granted, my body, my work and my finances for granted. I just wish I could go back a couple of years before the accident. It's very sobering and depressing to realize that you can NEVER go back.  But, I hobble on......


I get home and get back into bed and put the pillows around my head and that is where I have been all day and night. It's just one of those days where my mood has gotten worse with every passing hour. It's so frustrating to forget everything. I tried using the weekly pill dispenser but I forget to fill it and even when I do remember to fill it, I forget to use it. I stayed a couple of hours in the tub just to see if I could shake off this mood.


Nope.
It's still here.
If I could sleep I'd say tomorrow will be a better day.
But I probably won't sleep either.
By the way, I forgot to take my thyroid medication today.