Saturday, 13 March 2010

WAKING IN PAIN





43% Humidity

Another day of waking in pain.                                                       

Even though the weather seems better as far as the sunshine factor goes, the humidity is still out of control. 

It's having your eyes open at 3 in the morning because you're waking up every hour and you look at the clock knowing what you will face in the morning.

It's opening your eyes slowly and turning your head just slightly so you can get your pain medication before your body realizes your awake.

It's feeling the pain spring tightening in your body and trying to move fast enough to get coffee and get back in bed so you can cry in peace.

It's looking for anything to divert your attention from the prospect of facing the day in pain. 

It's watching my legs spasm and jump and wishing the I didn't have to take muscle relaxers for them to stop.

It's knowing that I need not to stress over the previous days events because that stress will only make this day worse.

It's hoping that I'll be able to attend my niece's 50th birthday party tonight with a real smile on my face and not a smile that hides what I'm really feeling.

It's knowing that if I even want to attempt this I'll need to rest all day today and that isn't a possibility.

It's hoping beyond hope.

It's looking around for the baseball bat to put me out of my misery.

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